Welcome / Now Fuck Off Garden Gnome Flag

From the sidewalk, it's the sweetest thing on the block. A cheerful little gnome. A tidy garden. A wooden sign that says Welcome in friendly, rounded letters. Neighbors approve. Linda assumes you've softened. HOA President is, as always, not reading closely enough.

Because tucked right under that sign, in lettering quiet enough to slip past the first look, the second look, and every look that isn't actually trying, is the part that's just for you: Now Fuck Off.

That's the whole trick. Nobody writes you up for a Welcome flag. Nobody files a complaint about a gnome. The HOA has nothing. Linda has nothing. And you get to fly exactly how you feel, in broad daylight, while the entire neighborhood thinks you've turned over a charming little leaf.

Welcome. Now fuck off. Both completely true. Both flying.

Details:
• Garden flag, 100% polyester, 12″ x 17″. Big enough to be charming, detailed enough to be deniable.
• Pole hem design, lightweight, ready to slide onto a standard garden flag stand.
• Double-sided print. The visible message says Welcome. The hidden one, just beneath the sign, says exactly what you mean.
• Pole not included. The plausible deniability very much is.

Perfect For:
The neighbor who treats your front yard like a community bulletin board and a personal grievance file. HOA situations where a direct message earns you a fine and a quiet one earns you peace. The friend who would never say it out loud but would absolutely fly it. Anyone who wants to be genuinely welcoming to the right people and perfectly, silently clear with everyone else.