{"title":"Get The Fuck Off My Lawn","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour yard is your tiny sanctuary. The place where the noise of the world doesn't exist. Your slice of heaven. Until someone decides otherwise.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Garden Variety Fuck Off Flags are for the people, the pets, the solicitors, and the general energy that has no business interrupting your nirvana. Not subtle enough to ignore. Not so loud the neighbors call someone. Just exactly right - planted in the ground, in plain sight, completely clear.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour lawn. Your rules. Your flag. Now get the fuck off my lawn. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"if-you-can-read-this-ring-camera-watching-double-sided-garden-flag","title":"If You Can Read This \/ Ring Camera Watching Double-Sided Garden Flag","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou have your little slice of heaven. And they have theirs. Never the two shall meet.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eNo more snooping in the garbage cans. No more stopping by when you are finally enjoying your own porch on a nice day. No more \"dropping off\" the newspaper like that is a thing anyone asked for. If you wanted to talk to them you would. You have not. That is the whole message.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe flag goes in the ground this weekend.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cem\u003eFront\u003c\/em\u003e: If You Can Read This Get the Fuck Off My Lawn \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cem\u003eBack\u003c\/em\u003e: The Ring Camera is Watching Stay the Fuck Off My Lawn\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTwo sides because some people need the warning on the way in and the reminder on the way out. The camera is rolling either way.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDetails:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e100% polyester, 12″ x 17″. Double-sided so the message is waiting for them coming and going\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePole hem, lightweight, goes exactly where the problem keeps happening\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause a strongly worded look out the window did absolutely nothing and this is the next logical step\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePole not included. The footage from last Thursday however is saved and available.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect For: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnyone who has opened their Ring app and had genuine feelings about what was on it. The neighbor whose definition of property lines is creative at best. The friend who has been sending you camera screenshots for months and needs to know you see it and are fully outraged on their behalf. Anyone who bought a Ring camera, watched the first week of footage, and immediately realized they needed more infrastructure out there. A housewarming gift for someone moving somewhere new who would like to establish the vibe on day one.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printful","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43915312889907,"sku":"6808311_19211","price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0613\/2881\/8227\/files\/garden-flag-white-12x17-front-696ad8ed6f99d.jpg?v=1768610055"},{"product_id":"pollinators-welcome-garden-flag","title":"Pollinators Welcome Garden Flag","description":"\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour garden has a guest list. The bees are on it. The butterflies are on it. The little beetles doing their thing in the dirt are absolutely on it. You know who is not on it? The neighborhood kids just cutting through. The dogs “helping” fertilize your lawn (we have a different \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/fuckoffflags.com\/products\/dog-poop-fuck-off-toothpick-flags\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eflag\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003cspan\u003e for that). Linda from down the street who keeps looking in your garbage cans. We SEE you!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThat’s right. Everybody else can fuck off.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Pollinators Welcome Garden Flag makes this VERY clear from the moment anyone sets foot near your garden bed. The right guests know they are welcome. The wrong ones had fair warning.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDetails:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e100% polyester, 12″ x 17″. Big enough to be seen from the sidewalk, which is where Linda should stay.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePole hem design, lightweight and easy to swap out with the seasons. The position on pollinators is year round.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOne-sided print. The bees can read it. Annoying neighbors can read it. Everybody knows where they stand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePole not included. The guest list very much is.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect For: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe gardener who has put genuine work into what is growing out there and would like the general public to respect it. Anyone currently maintaining a pollinator garden and also a very short list of people they want near it. The person who has had the \"actually those are intentional\" conversation with a neighbor one too many times and is done having it. A housewarming gift for the yard person in your life who also, separately, has a Linda situation. Anyone who has ever looked out their window and said oh my god what is she doing out there.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printful","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":44015236382771,"sku":"9042812_19211","price":15.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0613\/2881\/8227\/files\/garden-flag-white-12x17-front-697e3349ae072.jpg?v=1774541278"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0613\/2881\/8227\/collections\/garden-flag-white-12x17-front-696ad8ed6f2be.jpg?v=1773340748","url":"https:\/\/fuckoffflags.com\/collections\/get-the-fuck-off-my-lawn.oembed","provider":"Fuck Off Flags","version":"1.0","type":"link"}